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"Where have you been?" She asked.
"Everywhere and nowhere." I replied.
"But you were with me every moment."

Name: Hm, let's see. I most likely won't give you my real name, so just call me Stella. Yeah, that's an ass-kicking name! (:

Age: Soon to be a legal drinker!

I love: Reading, writing, drawing, watching movies, music.

I hate: the fact that it's hard to find decent people in this world. I also hate the smell of Hindi food, too bad it tastes good!

Currently: trying to figure out what life means? Yeah.

Movies: Pride & Prejudice, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Juno, the Other Boleyn Girl, Eurotrip, Atonement, Wedding Crashers, High Fidelity and much more that I'm too lazy to think of.

TV Programs: Seinfeld, Friends, That 70's Show, According to Jim, Everybody Loves Raymond, Gilmore Girls, One Tree Hill, The O.C, Simpsons, Family Guy etc.

Books & Authors: Time Traveler's Wife, Little Women, Romeo & Juliet, The Other Boleyn Girl, Jane Austen, Nick Hornby, Vonnegut, again, a lot of others I'm too lazy to think of!

Music: Coldplay, the Clash, Missy Higgins, Rolling Stones, White Stripes, Susie Suh, Tristan Prettyman, Zeppelin, ok let's stop pumpkins, I could go on forever.

Colors: Mhmm. I hate that one, haha. Okay let's go with my childhood color, I like blue. I also like orange and yellow for an unknown reason. Red and Purple are nice. Also green. Okay, bye.

Food:Haha, I looooove food. Donuts, cupcakes, ice cream, Doritos, Peanut butter cups, chocolate, Pringles...! And onto serious food - I like Chinese, Italian, Mexican, Moroccan and Thai. I also like fruits. Strawberries, watermelon, bananas (it always reminds me of cheerleaders, let's go bananas! Not.)

Drinks:Coffeeeeeeeeee. Tea's nice too. Vanilla milkshake, frappucinos, orange juice.

Actors:Jude Law (yum), Scarlett Johansson, Collin Firth, Heath Ledger :(, Ashton Kutcher (yum 2), Jennifer Aniston, Amanda Peet etc!


Look at the stars,
Look how they shine for you,
And everything you do,
Yeah they were all yellow,

I came along
I wrote a song for you
And all the things you do
And it was called yellow

So then I took my turn
Oh all the things I've done
And it was all yellow

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know you know I love you so
You know I love you so

I swam across
I jumped across for you
Oh all the things you do
Cause you were all yellow

I drew a line
I drew a line for you
Oh what a thing to do
And it was all yellow

Your skin
Oh yeah your skin and bones
Turn into something beautiful
D'you know for you i bleed myself dry
For you i bleed myself dry

Its true look how they shine for you

look at the stars look how they shine for you

Would you like some coffee?

Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile,
and finds in your presence that life is worth while.
So when you are lonely, remember it's true
Somebody somewhere is thinking of you.


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    Friday, January 15, 2021
    I haven't written here in nearly four years.
    This is my safe, sacred place, that no one knows about.
    Life is crazy that way, you're always busy, always have tasks to do, always in a hurry.
    But once in a long while I come here to remember ME. The old me? The real me?
    Or just really me - everchanging, but still deep down, the very same.
    Yet, I come here. Because today I'm a real grown up, with some real big-ass responsibilities (for the life of others, too!) and that sometimes makes me forget myself.
    I used to be so inspired. So driven. So... Deep.
    I felt overwhelmed while reading my old posts.
    I was so young when I wrote them, at the beginning of my career, beginning of my relationship. I was always questioning my decisions.
    Even though I was so young I showed a whole lot of hesitation about my job, and a whole lot of security about my relationship.
    Well, seven years later older me tells younger me: go with your gut feeling girl!
    Wrong job. Right man.
    Just go with your gut feeling.
    Don't be afraid of changes.
    Don't be afraid of what people will think of you or say.
    Don't be afraid to be who you are.

    Better sooner then later.

    Posted at 06:49 pm by Our-Eternity

    Saturday, February 11, 2017
    the planet Venus.
    Flickering lights,
    in the dark night sky.

    The cold penetrating my bones,
    sending a shiver down my spine.

    And I'm sinking into the planet Venus,
    where you have never been.

    Maybe I have sinned myself,
    for staying in my zone.

    As your planet is so far away from Venus,
    and so unknown.

    Maybe I have sinned,
    for always thinking I know right.

    Maybe on your planet,
    it is all so wrong.

    Still, it feels so alone here,
    I wish you'd understand and stop by.

    Posted at 09:39 pm by Our-Eternity

    Sunday, November 23, 2014
    Bizarre Love Triangle
    better not.

    Posted at 08:38 pm by Our-Eternity

    Tuesday, January 21, 2014
    I know I found the right thing.

    For the first time in my life, I found something right.

    We used to have fun all the time, spend time together without always feeling we had to rush everything and seize every moment.

    You say it's a good thing.

    I think it's not.

    Right things don't come as easily.

    Posted at 07:36 pm by Our-Eternity

    Thursday, September 26, 2013
    I wish I could go back. To when I was a child. Not worry about the future. Having my parents decide what is best for me. Not having to take responsibility for every thing I do. Not having to second guess every decision I have made and live with this unbearable feeling - maybe choosing differently would have been the right thing to do? Is this job right for me? Is this where I want to live? Is he the one? I used to think that when you know you know. But maybe you never really know. And how can you? There are so many paths along the way. How could you possibly know which one to choose? You are what you make of yourself. You can imagine a different life, at a different time, in a different place. But you never know which one is right for you, unless you try other things. But human beings like to stick to the old and familiar. To the safe way. Maybe I shouldn't always push myself to be someone, or something. Maybe I should have let things happen for themselves.

    Posted at 01:52 am by Our-Eternity

    Wednesday, July 03, 2013
    poison & wine
    You only know what I want you to
    I know everything you don't want me to
    Oh your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine
    You think your dreams are the same as mine
    Oh I don't love you but I always will
    Oh I don't love you but I always will
    Oh I don't love you but I always will
    I always will

    I wish you'd hold me when I turn my back
    The less I give the more I get back
    Oh your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
    I don't have a choice but I'd still choose you.

    Posted at 11:00 am by Our-Eternity

    Thursday, May 30, 2013
    Men are from Mars...
    and I am from Venus.

    Posted at 04:11 pm by Our-Eternity

    Friday, April 26, 2013
    All around, people changing.
    Places changing.
    Wardrobe changing.
    Seasons changing.

    Most of the time, I think I'm changing.
    But my core is still the same.

    Deep deep down, I'm always the same person.
    Where I am today, who I'm with today, all those things represent me.
    Sometimes it's scary. How the people you choose to live your life with and your job defines you.

    It's so scary for me.

    How do you know you made the right decisions?

    Posted at 09:19 pm by Our-Eternity

    Tuesday, March 05, 2013
    how long have I been in this storm?
    I haven't written anything for a while.

    I miss it.

    I miss myself, I miss being alone.

    I love being with him, I crave it. But at the same time, I feel like I'm losing myself.

    I really do love him. And everyone else does.

    But there are some things, I find difficult to deal with.

    I know it's a part of every relationship, but is it?

    There are so many things...

    He keeps saying I'm crazy all the time, and that I do crazy things.

    But is it a bad thing?

    I want him to be crazy too. I want him to do crazy things for me.

    We haven't been for a whole year together, and it feels like we're a married couple. I don't want that. I mean, I want that, just not now. I want stability, but I also want to feel young.

    He said he can't see himself without me, but how true is that?

    There are so many things about him that I love.

    I really tried to avoid writing this post.

    But I can't hold it inside anymore.

    Relationships aren't all about being good enough for each other. And loving each other. It's also about excitement.

    And excitement is what I'm missing.

    Posted at 09:34 am by Our-Eternity

    Tuesday, December 11, 2012
    all i want is you.
    When I first saw you, I don't remember how I felt.

    You were always there. I was aware of your existence. But all this time, I lived my life and you lived yours.

    I lived my life searching for you, while I knew you were there somewhere, I just didn't know you were what I was looking for.

    Running in circles, some might say, when I know there's a path somewhere that leads to you.

    I didn't go that way, for some years.

    It's faith, or coincidence, not sure, that brought us together again.

    A different time, a different place...

    I'm glad you met me twice. And I'm glad that when I first saw you nothing happened, because I don't know if my heart could still absorb you at the time.

    But the second time I saw you, I knew.

    I just knew.

    They say that when you know, you just know. And I never quite understood this. But now I do. Because now I know.

    And when you said goodbye and went to your apartment, I knew.

    I knew what was walking away from me.

    So I did what I had to do, or what my heart told me to do.

    I was never as certain in my life as I was at that time about a person.

    But sometimes I just get scared.

    I've been burnt before. And I don't mind being burnt by anyone else, but not you.

    I hope you love me as much as I love you.

    Posted at 09:38 pm by Our-Eternity

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